What a Hatch

The Handsome Man's father, a funny man in his own right, made the comment, "What a Hatch," referring to Richard Hatch of Survivor fame. That Hatch has also been, up until today, prisoner Hatch. The inflection used by father of Handsome Man, was less than appreciative when talking about the Newport resident who likes to run sans shirt through out neighborhood. But all I could think when I saw this link about the Senator from Utah was, What a Hatch.

Coupons made on his home computah

If you missed Saturday Night Live last night with Drew Barrymore, you missed some gems. Here is one in particular where James Carville, as played by Bill Hader, said this:

It's like looking into a mirror...after you've done a ton of coke off of it

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Bend It Like Beck
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor Michael Moore

SIDEBAR: Hmmmmm

Compare and Contrast:

Job Description

Local landscape architecture firm is seeking a hard working, motivated, part-time personal assistant who is willing and able to manage the president as well as assume responsibility for a number of administrative tasks. The Personal Assistant offers personalized support to the president as well as their family.

Responsibilities include, but not limited to:

- Walking 2 dogs twice daily ( Havanese breed, small)
- Lunch daily – prepare, serve
- Grocery shopping on weekly basis – for home and office
- Travel arrangements, making reservations
- Event and engagement organization and planning
- Running errands as needed, i.e. dry cleaning, gift purchasing
- Managing calendar, making appointments
- Placing orders online and from catalogues
-Correspondence including email, cards
-Coordinating and creating church usher schedule

Requirements:

- Detail oriented
- Superior organization and communication skills
- Microsoft Office proficient
- Some familiarity with Mac systems
- Must have reliable car
- Proof of car insurance
-Ability to work with little supervision

Flexible hours, approximately 20/week

Please email cover letter and resume to xxx@notreal.com
No phone calls please

That's 100!

As a show of my love and open-mindedness, I attended an event in support of a cause that is not exactly close to my heart. I found a few reasonable justifications for attending, as I am apt to do. The event was for the our state's young enter political party here. I was told that the head of the national party would be in attendance. This fellow is very entertaining, although not very effective - in my humble opinion. He, of course, was not in attendance. Also, as I am currently pursing a masters in Political Science, I figured it would be good to see how the other side operates, as I have yet to do in all my days of politicking. Needless to say, I am not worried and I was not impressed. I will omit the general cattiness that could fill this post and keep with the mission of this blog, what he said.
After over two hours, the speakers finally got up to energize their base. The guy in charge of this youth group, in an attempt to fire them up, gave some stats and info about the strength and momentum of their group. The one that he seemed most proud of and excited about was the difference in numbers of facebook members between their organization and their rival group.

Young guy: "Listen to this one. You're gonna love this! The Young enter opposition party here, as of today, has 350 members on facebook. Do you know how many we have, after only being around for 1 year?!?!? 450!!!!"

Handsome Man: (dripping with vodka and sarcasm) "That's 100!"

Me: dying laughing

Not so Young guy: turns to Handsome Man and nods, "that is 100," completely oblivious to the sarcasm yet swayed by the weight of the numbers

Again, I am not worried.

I know, I know

I know it has been quite a while since my last post. My only excuse is that I have been busy. One side effect of my busyness is fatigue. And when I am tired, I either have no time for or don't even pick up on those things I would normally find so funny. That or, he has been self-censoring...

Regardless, or irregardless, I will re-tune my ears to accommodate my new schedule and load. In the meantime, here is a link for a great story from this Sunday's On the Media - Defining Moments.

And if you're in the RI area, listen to WNRI and haven't pledged yet, you can do that here.

I'm Not Touching That One

My parents were in town the other weekend. That Sunday, we went to Castle Hill, a favorite haunt not only my bewitching beau appreciates, but it is a must visit when in our fair town. The fine fellow visits the resort and inn every Sunday during the winter season. He has gone so far as to have a drink he created put on the menu and named for him.
My mother, ever the enthusiast but not the drinker, wanted to try a non-alcoholic version of the drink. The waiter, a friend of the handsome man, came to take our drink orders. My mother asked for a virgin Hansom Man. The waiter, barely able to contain himself, simply replied, "I'm not even going to touch that one."

I'm Gonna Rock Out the Whole Time

I hear "Signs" by the Five Man Electric Band blaring out our study. I waltz in, singing along and take a seat. It is not uncommon for my pulchritudinous partner to play classic rock while on his laptop. He informs me he is searching for car insurance and rocking out to that song. He then informs me, "I'm gonna rock out the whole time."

All About Me

After accepting a moonlighting gig aboard a wealthy associate's ship, Mr. Man was not so hot on the affair. He did not want to go, even thought it involved a mere 2 hours of "work", free booze and $50 in cash. Whilst ferrying him to the sloop, he exclaimed, "I'm going to make this cruise all about me!" I laughed so hard, because he probably did.

No, I don't think that's right.

My love and I were driving to Boston not long ago. En route, we passed a couple of beautiful windmills. It did not appear to be very windy but the turbines were nonetheless turning. He wondered aloud how they worked, muttering something about how they much run off saved energy. I told him thatno, in fact they are powered by the wind and they accumulate energy that goes to power other things. He took in this information, savored it and then replied, "No, I don't think that's right."
I, who used to work for a group of non-profit public interest advocacy groups, many of whom worked and still work specifically on renewable energy, tried to explain further the basic idea of renewable wind energy. He continued to mull it over and said he would have to look into it himself.

Really?

We pull to up our favorite market tonight, to pick up dinner. We frequent this establishment so often that we have been offered a house account. The food is amazing. I highly recommend it if you are ever in the Fifth Ward. As we're exiting the car, the handsome man reads aloud the for-hire sign on the door. We joke about how great it would be to work there. I walk up to our favorite man behind the counter and begin to discuss the particulars of the position. The main selling point, for me anyway, is the family discount given to staff. I fill out an application in full. We purchase a scrumptious dinner and head on our way. On the ride home, after joking some more about how the handsome man would visit and harass me at work, he asks me how I knew they were hiring. My only response was, "Really?" His response was one of confusion, obviously. I reminded him of our entrance into the market not 15 minutes earlier. We laughed the rest of the way home.

Welcome to That's What HE Said!

This is a blog to host and post the wonderful and sometimes eccentric things my boyfriend says. He is smart, witty, warm and devastatingly handsome - and he knows it. He also sometimes lacks the filter between thoughts and voice and produces a wonderful glimpse into the inner workings of his mind. Perhaps it is the comfort he feels with me or perhaps he is certifiable. Either way, too much entertainment comes forth from his mouth to be kept from this great world.